Hola Mi Gente…
I had an interesting holiday: I got sick (twice!) and my debit card was hacked. Still, the time I was able to spend with my mother was priceless, so I’m not complaining.
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Sex, Your Higher Power and Ego
The trust you once owned,
oozed out of a bullet-hole
in your pretty back
and once gunned down
is enough for anyone.
Your first bloody death was funny
but your second would be foolish.
So a seasoned gunfighter
lives within you…
— Edward-Yemíl Rosario ©
Your Higher Power, however (or if) you conceptualize it, is love. When we are relating to the things and people around us with care, compassion, and consideration, we naturally radiate that love and joy. When we are not handling things in that manner, our spiritual life — our consciousness of the ever present energy of the Universal Principle — will be blocked by our apathy. In the interest of honesty, I wholeheartedly admit that there are times when I do not embody such caring, but I am still trying.
To go off tangent for a moment, I know of at least one woman who probably doesn’t like me too much these days and would most likely rather not hear from me… ever. I said at least one, but there are most likely more. The irony is this: until we can undo the karmic entanglement we have created, we will be forever linked. The relevant point being that if you want to be rid of me, then you’ll have to love me first. LOL I kid, but I’m serious — but I digress…
By not caring or being inconsiderate, we create an environment equal to that of a psychological pig sty. In that sty of negativity, not caring often means casting judgments on others. Anyone who’s ever been in a committed relationship will agree that this can be clearly evident as an expression we have taken to bed with us.
Part of sexual intimacy, aside from the obvious, is sleeping together, something both men and women often take for granted. In actuality, sleeping together is a profoundly intimate, trusting experience, although we have all at one time or another abused that intimate comfort.
How many times have you been in bed, irate because you knew the person next to you was “wrong” but wouldn’t admit it? What did that get you except the cheap thrill of righteous indignation, as you maintained this intimacy with a bad taste in your mouth, or a tense stomach? The fact is you could have bypassed that mess.
Perhaps your response might be: “I tried. I mean, if she would only admit she was wrong, everything would be fine.” To that, I will only say that I’m not talking about trying in that way. That is merely exacerbating the conflict.
Or, another response you might have is, “If only he’d stop being such an arrogant asshole, I might let him in.” To that I would say that’s not “in” — that is just allowing your lover out of the judgment jail you put him in the first place. There are alternatives, if you’re willing to put down the defense.
When you’re lying there with your lover in bed, you might instead opt to give them a light massage and as you’re doing that saying something along the lines of, “I don’t like being separate from you. I don’t care anymore about right and wrong. All I know is that I want to be with you and to care for you, and for you to forgive me.”
Your response to this might be to object, to say that why you should be the one to forgive if you were the wronged or injured party. Another person might say, “Give Eddie a massage?!! After what that psycho muthafucka said to me?” My response to you and to that form of thinking is that the best thing you can probably do is send the ego packing. To paraphrase a wise person, people say, “I want to love.” I say, drop the ego (I), do away with the desire (want), and what are you left with?
I will say this: be careful about sticking to your guns because you might then find yourself locked into playing the role of gunslinger for the rest of your life. And believe me, once you commit to the way of the gun, there will always be another relationship around the corner for you to gun down (or to gun you down) at the not-so-OK Corral.
To paraphrase another famous person, “I’m just sayin’… ”
If you desire to be with someone in warm, loving, caring, caressing support, I suggest you step out of ego-centered world of the Mini Me, and opt instead for that tender moment. We are here for just a brief moment, what a tragedy it would be not to grab some joy while you’re at it.
My name is Eddie and I’m in recovery from civilization…